And so tomorrow marks the day that promos start. GP first then Econs. Feel prepared/unprepared at the same time.
Exactly one week from now, I would be celebrating like crazy that Promos are over.
Too bad there's still the damn Chinese 'A' Levels nearing after that.
And not to mention the hectic rush for PW.
Just finished studying Econs chapter 3 to 4. shall breeze through chapter 2 after lunch and then read up some skills for gp essays and AQ and summary.
GOODBYE
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Tired
There's school tomorrow. Spent my weekend quite productively. Finished up my part for WR today. Fell sick yesterday cause I kept sleeping late every night. Time to come up with a new plan for revising. Though time is getting lesser and lesser. Shit. It's less than a week away. I wish teachers would stop giving us work. We need to study. I wish there was holidays before promos. Just like common test. Two study days isn't sufficient. Dk how I'm going to do two econs essays and at the same time revise everything. Feel so screwed up. JC life, one of the most demanding period of your life that will stretch you to your maximum potential. Yet sometimes I think. Think ever so hard. What am I studying for? Its all just for grades... Why is the world so competitive? So only the best and excel... Zhi Yong quoted George Carlin before, he said life was about waking up, eating, taking a good shit and sleeping again. If only it were that simple.
Anyway for the past week i've been having good talks with Zhi Yong and Nicholas about life. I realized me and Zhi Yong have a lot in common, especially in our thoughts and mindset. As for Nicholas, I can feel that we have this unannounced friendship. You know those kind of friends you can make fun of but you know you're still friends? Yeah those kind...
Studying econs now. I feel like giving up on schoolwork and just mug my ass off for promos. Ok that's what I'll do.
Anyway for the past week i've been having good talks with Zhi Yong and Nicholas about life. I realized me and Zhi Yong have a lot in common, especially in our thoughts and mindset. As for Nicholas, I can feel that we have this unannounced friendship. You know those kind of friends you can make fun of but you know you're still friends? Yeah those kind...
Studying econs now. I feel like giving up on schoolwork and just mug my ass off for promos. Ok that's what I'll do.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Lazy
Getting lazier to post stuff. Too caught up in all the work to give time for myself to reflect through blogging. Regardless, I shall write another poem..
A young boy
An old man
Too similar differences
Happy but sad;
Childish but wise.
Alone they face
Life's simple complications,
Pursuing endless success,
Yet halting to regrets.
If he is just one boy
Why is he a man?
If he is a man,
Why is he a boy?
But he is just one
With problems of two.
A young boy
An old man
Too similar differences
Happy but sad;
Childish but wise.
Alone they face
Life's simple complications,
Pursuing endless success,
Yet halting to regrets.
If he is just one boy
Why is he a man?
If he is a man,
Why is he a boy?
But he is just one
With problems of two.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Back to school. Again.
Stayed up late last night to finish up integration tutorial 2. Woke up this morning later than usual and rushed to bathe and eat and pack my bag. My mum drove me to school and she talked to me about something bad that happened recently. Hope things turn out fine in the end. But I'm worried. Really worried...
Reached school. Instinctively walked to the OAC Store. Eunice and Zi Wei was inside. Finished up the last question for int techniques tutorial. Filbert and Yi Ting came in halfway. Assembly was going to start soon so we left and we saw Fu Zhi and Hui Qi outside. I locked the door and proceeded to the parade square with the rest.
Assembly was ok. Everything went smoothly. Somehow there were no announcements and pub stunt.
Physics lesson first. Went thru COE. Understood Discussion question 3. Started going my DC Circuits.
Break. Went with NJ081 to go buy our group project file. Its with me now, safe and sound at home.
It was Chinese next. Did a mock paper. Did quite ok and felt quite satisfied with it.
Then break. Went to eat lunch. The usual western meal.
Then Chem. It was ok. Forgot to bring my notes though but Jia Ying shared with me.
Maths lecture. Did the new notes. Miss Tan was the new lecturer.
GP. Did a timed practice Promo paper from last year.
PE. Played captain's ball with a tennis ball then later a volleyball. It was fun blocking the ball.
Studied with some of my classmates after school. Many of them left until left only Zhi Yong and Nicholas and Rosemund. When it was getting late she called her parents to go pick her up from school whereas me Zhi Yong and Nicholas were offered a ride to Marymount by Mr Lee who took pity on us lol. Felt quite bad today cause i was quite cranky and behave like an ass towards Nicholas and Zhi Yong today. Really sorry. Don't know what happened to me. Must be having a bad day. Sigh. And yet fearful thoughts kept penetrating my head the whole day. I just hope nothing serious happens. God shouldn't do this. If there is a God he shouldn't do this... Life is unfair. 2nd time I cried this year after hoping that I won't cry this whole year. Shit. I'm really scared. But I dont want to tell anyone about it. People have enough to worry about - exams, work, etc. And so do I. Maybe I should just occupy myself with all this shit to keep my mind off it. I just wish so damn hard nothing bad will happen. Going through the same shit in sec 3 was bad enough, please God, if you really do exist, don't let something like that really come true...
Reached school. Instinctively walked to the OAC Store. Eunice and Zi Wei was inside. Finished up the last question for int techniques tutorial. Filbert and Yi Ting came in halfway. Assembly was going to start soon so we left and we saw Fu Zhi and Hui Qi outside. I locked the door and proceeded to the parade square with the rest.
Assembly was ok. Everything went smoothly. Somehow there were no announcements and pub stunt.
Physics lesson first. Went thru COE. Understood Discussion question 3. Started going my DC Circuits.
Break. Went with NJ081 to go buy our group project file. Its with me now, safe and sound at home.
It was Chinese next. Did a mock paper. Did quite ok and felt quite satisfied with it.
Then break. Went to eat lunch. The usual western meal.
Then Chem. It was ok. Forgot to bring my notes though but Jia Ying shared with me.
Maths lecture. Did the new notes. Miss Tan was the new lecturer.
GP. Did a timed practice Promo paper from last year.
PE. Played captain's ball with a tennis ball then later a volleyball. It was fun blocking the ball.
Studied with some of my classmates after school. Many of them left until left only Zhi Yong and Nicholas and Rosemund. When it was getting late she called her parents to go pick her up from school whereas me Zhi Yong and Nicholas were offered a ride to Marymount by Mr Lee who took pity on us lol. Felt quite bad today cause i was quite cranky and behave like an ass towards Nicholas and Zhi Yong today. Really sorry. Don't know what happened to me. Must be having a bad day. Sigh. And yet fearful thoughts kept penetrating my head the whole day. I just hope nothing serious happens. God shouldn't do this. If there is a God he shouldn't do this... Life is unfair. 2nd time I cried this year after hoping that I won't cry this whole year. Shit. I'm really scared. But I dont want to tell anyone about it. People have enough to worry about - exams, work, etc. And so do I. Maybe I should just occupy myself with all this shit to keep my mind off it. I just wish so damn hard nothing bad will happen. Going through the same shit in sec 3 was bad enough, please God, if you really do exist, don't let something like that really come true...
Saturday, September 17, 2011
End of the first week of school
Yesterday was a meaningful day. It's one of those days that you realize you grow up a little in your maturity.
Can't really remember everything that happened yesterday cause I was quite tired.
Woke up at 4am in the morning yesterday cause I had a very strange dream and checked my phone. Rosemund asked me to meet her in the morning to lend her my notes cause she didn't go to school on Wednesday and missed all the notes for lecture. So I came to school quite early, about 6.40am I reached school and went to sit at the benches. Did a bit of my work. Chester came later and we talked for a while. Then Rosemund finally came and she sat on the bench beside me. I lent her my DC circuits and organic chem notes. She tried to do the organic chem questions and I helped her a bit but end up during the Chem lecture after that I realized I taught her some parts wrongly lol.
We completed those two topics during phy and chem lecture. I guess that's it. We're all armed up for the promos.
After lecture we had a break. The 5 gate climbers went to see MG at the staff room. Thankfully she didn't scold us but just told us we were silly and the usual warnings. Then our punishment was to clean the boulder gym wall but that's ok since I was planning to do that after promos anyway. So my punishment so far is a drop in my conduct grade, CWO of moving tables and chairs for exams and cleaning the boulder gym wall. Quite ok considering how strict the school is...
Rushed to eat my food in the canteen and went for GP after that. We did this fun activity which involved arranging ourselves based on our level of importance when each of us were given random age, gender, job and nationality. However it really exposed me to why Zi Wei dislikes big bag. He was in my group and he kept insisting he was the most important. We actually alr decided (based on random dice lol) who was least and most important. Guess he took it too seriously cause when we were standing in one row, he insisted on changing position with another guy in our group so that he would be the most important. I was utterly disgusted. Wtf. He just wants to have his way. And regardless of what role he got, he would have twisted his way into being the most important, which just shows how superior he views himself. But anyway I'm in no position to judge. Just to feel sickened by a few people in my school. It really opens my eyes to how futup people can be... Then again, everyone has their flaws.
Chinese after that. It was ok. Went through the same chapter.
Then we had break. We went to raintree cafe to eat a bit and finish up the rest of COE for physics lesson.
3 periods of physics next cause no more spa. She showed us a cool ripple tank experiment for the first period and the next hour she went through the rest of superposition and a bit of COE. Was sitting beside Zi Ren and we talked about china scholars and how boarding school was like for him. Realize it's actually tough to leave one's own country to go into a foreign land to study.
Then we had GC. Watched the movie and did reflection. Some of us started a mass convo on what's app and talked crap.
PW lecture was alright. I realized that jc life can really stress people up. I sort of feel sad that becoming close friends is really difficult in jc cause everyone has too much on their mind, until we get so frustrated that we forget who really cares about us... And that happens to me too. Whenever I'm too f-ed up with all the work and all the responsibilities, I come back home and snap at my family members when they try and talk to me and I hurt them accidentally when all they wanted was to show their care and concern. It's hard to maintain harmonious relations when life gives you so much shit to handle. But I believe through suffering together, it will be a true test of one's friendship with others.
After lecture we had GP Lecture. Went through our CA2. Was getting quite sleepy by then.
Then went to study at the raintree cafe with Rosemund, Han Ru, Leon, Nicholas, Gavin, Benny and Jin Yong. Han Ru left quite early. Very soon Rosemund and Gavin left too. She couldn't finish her cookie so she gave it to me to eat hehe. Then only left me, Nicholas, Leon and Benny cause Jin Yong left soon after. We all started talking about our life stories, the different ups and downs that we went through before. It was really interesting cause I got to know all of them better, especially Leon. Thats the main part of yesterday which really made me mature a little in word and deed. Mr Lee came later and gave Nicholas a chance to finish up his tutorial by tuesday instead cause it was getting late. He then drove the 4 of us to serene centre macs to eat dinner with us. He taught me something meaningful when he was talking to me about my gate climbing incident and about my conduct grade being dropped. He told me that just like doing Maktab duty, people wont remember and appreciate you despite all the effort and time you spent on doing that duty. But the moment u screw up, everyone remembers you for being a failure. That made me realize that no matter what good I do the school, as long as I break one minor rule like this, my entire future is tarnished. Life is so unfair. Ate our fill and bade goodbye to mr lee as we headed for the bus stop. Benny took bus somewhere else. Leon was having gastric and farted when Nic was behind him LOL. But Nic didn't know xD Leon took bus to newton and then mrt to orchard to meet his sis whereas Nicholas agreed to taking 156 with me home even though he had to walk quite far home from the bus stop he would alight at but I could tell he wanted to talk a little more.
Reached home. Did a bit of reaction kinetics and knocked out after that.
Woke up this morning and had a long debate in the car with my parents and sister about the punishment I received for my offence. They felt it was unfair cause I was getting double punishment (conduct grade and CWO) for just one minor mistake. My mum was furious and wanted to write a letter to my school but I told her not to because it was not worth it. Some day when I get the chance I'm going to voice out that we really need a one way gate at the bus stop. Fuck the cost of hiring security guard or installing such a gate. Think about your students first instead of budget. That's what a school is supposed to be, not a maximum security prison. For the benefit of future generations, open the damn gate for our convenience. I'm willing to take up all the punishments, so why arent you willing to change the system after realizing that for the past 15 years, students have been complaining about the gate problem? Don't just take all feedback as one ear in one ear out.
Rage. Talking about that makes my blood boil. Really wants to make me stand up for a good cause rather than do nothing.
So now I'm trapped in a dental clinic waiting for my turn to go in. Super long queue despite booking my appointment at 10.15am, I'm still waiting until now -.- and it's not like I came late. zzz.
Shall end off here. Wrote a lot. Took 10% of my battery typing this whole thing out.
Can't really remember everything that happened yesterday cause I was quite tired.
Woke up at 4am in the morning yesterday cause I had a very strange dream and checked my phone. Rosemund asked me to meet her in the morning to lend her my notes cause she didn't go to school on Wednesday and missed all the notes for lecture. So I came to school quite early, about 6.40am I reached school and went to sit at the benches. Did a bit of my work. Chester came later and we talked for a while. Then Rosemund finally came and she sat on the bench beside me. I lent her my DC circuits and organic chem notes. She tried to do the organic chem questions and I helped her a bit but end up during the Chem lecture after that I realized I taught her some parts wrongly lol.
We completed those two topics during phy and chem lecture. I guess that's it. We're all armed up for the promos.
After lecture we had a break. The 5 gate climbers went to see MG at the staff room. Thankfully she didn't scold us but just told us we were silly and the usual warnings. Then our punishment was to clean the boulder gym wall but that's ok since I was planning to do that after promos anyway. So my punishment so far is a drop in my conduct grade, CWO of moving tables and chairs for exams and cleaning the boulder gym wall. Quite ok considering how strict the school is...
Rushed to eat my food in the canteen and went for GP after that. We did this fun activity which involved arranging ourselves based on our level of importance when each of us were given random age, gender, job and nationality. However it really exposed me to why Zi Wei dislikes big bag. He was in my group and he kept insisting he was the most important. We actually alr decided (based on random dice lol) who was least and most important. Guess he took it too seriously cause when we were standing in one row, he insisted on changing position with another guy in our group so that he would be the most important. I was utterly disgusted. Wtf. He just wants to have his way. And regardless of what role he got, he would have twisted his way into being the most important, which just shows how superior he views himself. But anyway I'm in no position to judge. Just to feel sickened by a few people in my school. It really opens my eyes to how futup people can be... Then again, everyone has their flaws.
Chinese after that. It was ok. Went through the same chapter.
Then we had break. We went to raintree cafe to eat a bit and finish up the rest of COE for physics lesson.
3 periods of physics next cause no more spa. She showed us a cool ripple tank experiment for the first period and the next hour she went through the rest of superposition and a bit of COE. Was sitting beside Zi Ren and we talked about china scholars and how boarding school was like for him. Realize it's actually tough to leave one's own country to go into a foreign land to study.
Then we had GC. Watched the movie and did reflection. Some of us started a mass convo on what's app and talked crap.
PW lecture was alright. I realized that jc life can really stress people up. I sort of feel sad that becoming close friends is really difficult in jc cause everyone has too much on their mind, until we get so frustrated that we forget who really cares about us... And that happens to me too. Whenever I'm too f-ed up with all the work and all the responsibilities, I come back home and snap at my family members when they try and talk to me and I hurt them accidentally when all they wanted was to show their care and concern. It's hard to maintain harmonious relations when life gives you so much shit to handle. But I believe through suffering together, it will be a true test of one's friendship with others.
After lecture we had GP Lecture. Went through our CA2. Was getting quite sleepy by then.
Then went to study at the raintree cafe with Rosemund, Han Ru, Leon, Nicholas, Gavin, Benny and Jin Yong. Han Ru left quite early. Very soon Rosemund and Gavin left too. She couldn't finish her cookie so she gave it to me to eat hehe. Then only left me, Nicholas, Leon and Benny cause Jin Yong left soon after. We all started talking about our life stories, the different ups and downs that we went through before. It was really interesting cause I got to know all of them better, especially Leon. Thats the main part of yesterday which really made me mature a little in word and deed. Mr Lee came later and gave Nicholas a chance to finish up his tutorial by tuesday instead cause it was getting late. He then drove the 4 of us to serene centre macs to eat dinner with us. He taught me something meaningful when he was talking to me about my gate climbing incident and about my conduct grade being dropped. He told me that just like doing Maktab duty, people wont remember and appreciate you despite all the effort and time you spent on doing that duty. But the moment u screw up, everyone remembers you for being a failure. That made me realize that no matter what good I do the school, as long as I break one minor rule like this, my entire future is tarnished. Life is so unfair. Ate our fill and bade goodbye to mr lee as we headed for the bus stop. Benny took bus somewhere else. Leon was having gastric and farted when Nic was behind him LOL. But Nic didn't know xD Leon took bus to newton and then mrt to orchard to meet his sis whereas Nicholas agreed to taking 156 with me home even though he had to walk quite far home from the bus stop he would alight at but I could tell he wanted to talk a little more.
Reached home. Did a bit of reaction kinetics and knocked out after that.
Woke up this morning and had a long debate in the car with my parents and sister about the punishment I received for my offence. They felt it was unfair cause I was getting double punishment (conduct grade and CWO) for just one minor mistake. My mum was furious and wanted to write a letter to my school but I told her not to because it was not worth it. Some day when I get the chance I'm going to voice out that we really need a one way gate at the bus stop. Fuck the cost of hiring security guard or installing such a gate. Think about your students first instead of budget. That's what a school is supposed to be, not a maximum security prison. For the benefit of future generations, open the damn gate for our convenience. I'm willing to take up all the punishments, so why arent you willing to change the system after realizing that for the past 15 years, students have been complaining about the gate problem? Don't just take all feedback as one ear in one ear out.
Rage. Talking about that makes my blood boil. Really wants to make me stand up for a good cause rather than do nothing.
So now I'm trapped in a dental clinic waiting for my turn to go in. Super long queue despite booking my appointment at 10.15am, I'm still waiting until now -.- and it's not like I came late. zzz.
Shall end off here. Wrote a lot. Took 10% of my battery typing this whole thing out.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Fourth day of school
Today was an alright day. As usual, Thursdays were Maths and econs day.
Came to school in the morning. Went to tap my finger and after that went to the oac store to do some work. Saw Zi Wei there. He was studying too. Very soon a few seniors and other OACians came and I became high for no reason doing random stupid things in the store.
Econs lecture after that. It was ok. Maths lecture after that. It was ok. Went to see SP after that. It was... Surprisingly ok. She didn't give us that harsh a punishment that I thought she would. We only kana moving tables and chairs for exams so I guess that's ok.
But what really made me feel shitty was meeting MG. She was really angry and disappointed with us and wanted to meet all of us tmr during break. She has every right to be pissed with us since we didnt have enough guts to tell her what happened.
After that Eunice came and talked to us. Then I went to find my class to eat. Ate standard western meal again.
Ate with mr lee. Found out that he knew about my offence. Glad he wasn't angry at me or whatsoever. Hope I don't get a yellow slip though. SP is still reconsidering whether to give to us or not...
Went for PW. It was ok cause we didn't really do much. Have to start doing our WR draft 2 ASAP though.
Then Maths. It was quite slack. Did my tutorial 2. Realised I was lagging behind most of the class.
Break. Just continued doing work.
Econs. Ok as usual. Went through essay.
PE was fun. Played frisbee.
Physics consul. Did 6 mcq questions but at least managed to clarify my doubts.
Studied with Zhi Yong and Rosemund after that. Joel yip and Chi Wen were beside us studying too. Went home through taking 74 with yip and James and bade goodbye to Rosemund. Chi Wen went to find his gf hehe. Zhi Yong alighted at his stop whereas me and yip went to take train from Marymount to bishan. Bought bread there and talked a lot and then took bus home. Reached home and now I'm blogging while eating dinner.
Sigh. Feeling quite sian nowadays with everything that has happened. Shall write a poem.
The mask of all masks
Has an important task,
Thoughts with vile intentions
Be preyed on by one's actions.
Hurt so severe and deep,
Yet not a single weep.
Wanting to speak the truth,
But nothing will ever sooth,
The heart which so dearly miss,
the ignorance that was bliss.
Came to school in the morning. Went to tap my finger and after that went to the oac store to do some work. Saw Zi Wei there. He was studying too. Very soon a few seniors and other OACians came and I became high for no reason doing random stupid things in the store.
Econs lecture after that. It was ok. Maths lecture after that. It was ok. Went to see SP after that. It was... Surprisingly ok. She didn't give us that harsh a punishment that I thought she would. We only kana moving tables and chairs for exams so I guess that's ok.
But what really made me feel shitty was meeting MG. She was really angry and disappointed with us and wanted to meet all of us tmr during break. She has every right to be pissed with us since we didnt have enough guts to tell her what happened.
After that Eunice came and talked to us. Then I went to find my class to eat. Ate standard western meal again.
Ate with mr lee. Found out that he knew about my offence. Glad he wasn't angry at me or whatsoever. Hope I don't get a yellow slip though. SP is still reconsidering whether to give to us or not...
Went for PW. It was ok cause we didn't really do much. Have to start doing our WR draft 2 ASAP though.
Then Maths. It was quite slack. Did my tutorial 2. Realised I was lagging behind most of the class.
Break. Just continued doing work.
Econs. Ok as usual. Went through essay.
PE was fun. Played frisbee.
Physics consul. Did 6 mcq questions but at least managed to clarify my doubts.
Studied with Zhi Yong and Rosemund after that. Joel yip and Chi Wen were beside us studying too. Went home through taking 74 with yip and James and bade goodbye to Rosemund. Chi Wen went to find his gf hehe. Zhi Yong alighted at his stop whereas me and yip went to take train from Marymount to bishan. Bought bread there and talked a lot and then took bus home. Reached home and now I'm blogging while eating dinner.
Sigh. Feeling quite sian nowadays with everything that has happened. Shall write a poem.
The mask of all masks
Has an important task,
Thoughts with vile intentions
Be preyed on by one's actions.
Hurt so severe and deep,
Yet not a single weep.
Wanting to speak the truth,
But nothing will ever sooth,
The heart which so dearly miss,
the ignorance that was bliss.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
The third day of school
It has been three days since term started. I wish I had more time. JC life is so hectic. Can't wait to just relax and only have to worry about my fitness level once I get into NS.
Woke up in the morning to the sound of heavy rain and booming thunder. Damn Zhi Yong that lucky basterd! He got to skip doing maktab duty cause of the wet parade square floor.
Reached school and studied in the OAC Store with Eunice, Zi Wei and with Filbert who was so tired that he sat on the chair in the store and just knocked out completely.
Went to tap our fingers. Bade goodbye and went to class. Saw mr lee at the corridor and he took my attendance. Entered class smoke screen style and prepared for the first lesson of the day.
Econs. Eli was relatively ok today even though wednesday was bad mood day for him. He went through our case study. Nothing much to say.
Maths. Mr Lee went through integration. I haven't finish integration tutorial 2 yet and I think I won't be able to. Haven't even touched any rev packages.
Chem. Boring cause I was getting tired and hungry. Managed to do quite a few reaction kinetics tutorial questions.
Break. Today someone sat with us in the canteen to eat cause there wasn't enough seats. Was really surprised that he was willing to eat with us. Don't see how he's not part of the class and why cause of that he doesn't want the hoodie...
I kinda wonder what it's like for him. For all I know he may read my blog daily. Idk. I sort of feel sorry for him sometimes. To speak the harsh truth, he has no friends. And I wonder how he can stand living like that, to have nobody to talk to, nobody to share your thoughts and troubles with, nobody to cheer u up whenever you're down, nobody to give u advice etc. Seriously. Coming into this world and leaving it without doing good for others when you exist is a meaningless one.
Anyway my interview didn't go too well... Maybe won't get in. A part of me wish I wouldn't, another part wish I would. Priorities.
Don't want to talk much about the interview. It was just bad..
Went home. Ate lunch. Bathe. Did some work and ate dinner. Sian. It's starting to rain again. Another cold rainy day, there's nothing left to say.
Woke up in the morning to the sound of heavy rain and booming thunder. Damn Zhi Yong that lucky basterd! He got to skip doing maktab duty cause of the wet parade square floor.
Reached school and studied in the OAC Store with Eunice, Zi Wei and with Filbert who was so tired that he sat on the chair in the store and just knocked out completely.
Went to tap our fingers. Bade goodbye and went to class. Saw mr lee at the corridor and he took my attendance. Entered class smoke screen style and prepared for the first lesson of the day.
Econs. Eli was relatively ok today even though wednesday was bad mood day for him. He went through our case study. Nothing much to say.
Maths. Mr Lee went through integration. I haven't finish integration tutorial 2 yet and I think I won't be able to. Haven't even touched any rev packages.
Chem. Boring cause I was getting tired and hungry. Managed to do quite a few reaction kinetics tutorial questions.
Break. Today someone sat with us in the canteen to eat cause there wasn't enough seats. Was really surprised that he was willing to eat with us. Don't see how he's not part of the class and why cause of that he doesn't want the hoodie...
I kinda wonder what it's like for him. For all I know he may read my blog daily. Idk. I sort of feel sorry for him sometimes. To speak the harsh truth, he has no friends. And I wonder how he can stand living like that, to have nobody to talk to, nobody to share your thoughts and troubles with, nobody to cheer u up whenever you're down, nobody to give u advice etc. Seriously. Coming into this world and leaving it without doing good for others when you exist is a meaningless one.
Anyway my interview didn't go too well... Maybe won't get in. A part of me wish I wouldn't, another part wish I would. Priorities.
Don't want to talk much about the interview. It was just bad..
Went home. Ate lunch. Bathe. Did some work and ate dinner. Sian. It's starting to rain again. Another cold rainy day, there's nothing left to say.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Unholy Confessions
Second day of school. Counting the days to the promos~
Went to school quite early today. Slept a while at the benches for about 20 mins while listening to music. Chester came and we talked about random stuff like runescape. Zi Wei, Ian, Samuel and Zhi Yong came around 7.30am and then we talked more until the bell rang and Samuel rushed off to do Maktab duty today. turns out yesterday his mum was late for work and couldn't fetch him to school so she just told him to stay at home instead LOL when he was already outside his house in full grey.
After morning assembly, we walked to our class for the first lesson of the day - PW! i remembered walking with Zhi Yong in the front towards class. Yeah idk why i remembered that i just did. We remember strange memories for no reason. PW was great, Mr Lee went through my group's WR. Although lots of changes have to be made, I'm glad we managed to get back his comments fast so that we have more time to work on it. We have to get a larger target audience though, hence we came up with a survey and publicised it on fb. hopefully we get sufficient responses :)
discussed WR until the lesson ended. went to get the phy consol rev package with Han Ru and also got copies for Gavin, Jun An and Rosemund. went back to class after we bought it but they all left for the canteen alr :( Jia Ying was still inside chionging her econs. She seemed really pissed and irritated after what happened today, hope she's ok now.
went to the canteen with Han Ru and ate western food again. must avoid eating it tmr. three days in a row = some disease that is caused by over consumption of western food.
after that we went back to class for physics lesson. she went through superposition about how slit affects intensity and i failed at trying to explain to Rosemund about the intensity/energy/area thingy. Managed to do some questions for my current of electricity tutorial though.
after that was three periods of chem. was doing my reaction kinetics and talking crap with Nicholas. did reaction kinetics until the graph question; got turned off by the word 'Plot the graph' and decided to listen to granny yeo's lesson instead. realised a mistake i made in the ionic equilibrium tutorial. after that i went to do question 19 on the board but there was not enough space so only managed to do until half of part 3 LOL. then Yun Ying said something along the lines of writing the final answer on the board so i went up there to write my answers for the other parts of the question which i didnt have space to do. then she went through the question and i finally understood when to use estimation of x and when not to.
after chem, Zhi Yong asked me some question in the tutorial (12iii i think) and i couldnt answer at first but then after reading the notes i finally understood and explained to him lol. it was about the indicator calculation of Ka thingy.
Then we went to raintree cafe and ate. I bought a tuna puff. Then went for econs. he went through the difficult healthcare essay that we did. sort of understood his explanation.
then there was another break. forgot what i did then. oh yeah we gave out the class photos i think. then we pasted them on the back of our class and we laughed at different people's photo (well mostly Yun Ying was laughing) Hope she brings her baby photo next time and we can laugh at HER.
break ended and we went for chinese. it was at CS21 cause Jin Yong's pw group was using CS23 for their PW project. Was awed that they managed to get Anderson Sec students to come to NJ by a chartered bus for their project. They are sure to do well and their pilot test was also very good (Y)
so chinese. i was surprised to see Zi Wei angry today. Never seen him so angry before. But he cooled down after a while. Me and Nicholas presented the part about the author's teacher and I had to act out as the teacher.
After chinese, me, Nicholas and Rosemund went to study at the raintree cafe benches. Nicholas bought lots of shit to eat (two sandwiches, one tuna puff, nachos etc.) whereas i bought just a curry puff. Rosemund bought a ham and cheese sandwich. We did our work. managed to do some phy consol MCQ. Nicholas and Rosemund were trying to do their econs but i think it ended up unproductive lol. Then Rosemund's dad came to fetch her and so me and Nicholas left for the bus stop immediately after she left. Met Ken, Samuel and Zi Wei at the store as I went there to collect the apology letters. We walked to the bus stop and Zi Wei went to the opposite bus stop. Nicholas' bus came soon after and he left. Ken missed his bus though. Ken was trying to gay me. After that Ken and Samuel left the bus stop to idk where (either opposite or the further in front bus stop) so i stood there beside Joel Teng, the guy who keeps calling me Lester who is some Marist Guy that looks like me (or rather I look like him) So 156 came and i boarded it and went home.
reached home --> ate dinner --> use the com to blog --> on my way to go and bathe and do my work.
tmr is my research program interview! I hope all goes well :)
shall sleep early today to look fresh tomorrow.
Shall end of with a great song by Avenged Sevenfold. In my opinion, Unholy Confessions is one of their best songs. Ok nvm all their songs are their best (Y)
Went to school quite early today. Slept a while at the benches for about 20 mins while listening to music. Chester came and we talked about random stuff like runescape. Zi Wei, Ian, Samuel and Zhi Yong came around 7.30am and then we talked more until the bell rang and Samuel rushed off to do Maktab duty today. turns out yesterday his mum was late for work and couldn't fetch him to school so she just told him to stay at home instead LOL when he was already outside his house in full grey.
After morning assembly, we walked to our class for the first lesson of the day - PW! i remembered walking with Zhi Yong in the front towards class. Yeah idk why i remembered that i just did. We remember strange memories for no reason. PW was great, Mr Lee went through my group's WR. Although lots of changes have to be made, I'm glad we managed to get back his comments fast so that we have more time to work on it. We have to get a larger target audience though, hence we came up with a survey and publicised it on fb. hopefully we get sufficient responses :)
discussed WR until the lesson ended. went to get the phy consol rev package with Han Ru and also got copies for Gavin, Jun An and Rosemund. went back to class after we bought it but they all left for the canteen alr :( Jia Ying was still inside chionging her econs. She seemed really pissed and irritated after what happened today, hope she's ok now.
went to the canteen with Han Ru and ate western food again. must avoid eating it tmr. three days in a row = some disease that is caused by over consumption of western food.
after that we went back to class for physics lesson. she went through superposition about how slit affects intensity and i failed at trying to explain to Rosemund about the intensity/energy/area thingy. Managed to do some questions for my current of electricity tutorial though.
after that was three periods of chem. was doing my reaction kinetics and talking crap with Nicholas. did reaction kinetics until the graph question; got turned off by the word 'Plot the graph' and decided to listen to granny yeo's lesson instead. realised a mistake i made in the ionic equilibrium tutorial. after that i went to do question 19 on the board but there was not enough space so only managed to do until half of part 3 LOL. then Yun Ying said something along the lines of writing the final answer on the board so i went up there to write my answers for the other parts of the question which i didnt have space to do. then she went through the question and i finally understood when to use estimation of x and when not to.
after chem, Zhi Yong asked me some question in the tutorial (12iii i think) and i couldnt answer at first but then after reading the notes i finally understood and explained to him lol. it was about the indicator calculation of Ka thingy.
Then we went to raintree cafe and ate. I bought a tuna puff. Then went for econs. he went through the difficult healthcare essay that we did. sort of understood his explanation.
then there was another break. forgot what i did then. oh yeah we gave out the class photos i think. then we pasted them on the back of our class and we laughed at different people's photo (well mostly Yun Ying was laughing) Hope she brings her baby photo next time and we can laugh at HER.
break ended and we went for chinese. it was at CS21 cause Jin Yong's pw group was using CS23 for their PW project. Was awed that they managed to get Anderson Sec students to come to NJ by a chartered bus for their project. They are sure to do well and their pilot test was also very good (Y)
so chinese. i was surprised to see Zi Wei angry today. Never seen him so angry before. But he cooled down after a while. Me and Nicholas presented the part about the author's teacher and I had to act out as the teacher.
After chinese, me, Nicholas and Rosemund went to study at the raintree cafe benches. Nicholas bought lots of shit to eat (two sandwiches, one tuna puff, nachos etc.) whereas i bought just a curry puff. Rosemund bought a ham and cheese sandwich. We did our work. managed to do some phy consol MCQ. Nicholas and Rosemund were trying to do their econs but i think it ended up unproductive lol. Then Rosemund's dad came to fetch her and so me and Nicholas left for the bus stop immediately after she left. Met Ken, Samuel and Zi Wei at the store as I went there to collect the apology letters. We walked to the bus stop and Zi Wei went to the opposite bus stop. Nicholas' bus came soon after and he left. Ken missed his bus though. Ken was trying to gay me. After that Ken and Samuel left the bus stop to idk where (either opposite or the further in front bus stop) so i stood there beside Joel Teng, the guy who keeps calling me Lester who is some Marist Guy that looks like me (or rather I look like him) So 156 came and i boarded it and went home.
reached home --> ate dinner --> use the com to blog --> on my way to go and bathe and do my work.
tmr is my research program interview! I hope all goes well :)
shall sleep early today to look fresh tomorrow.
Shall end of with a great song by Avenged Sevenfold. In my opinion, Unholy Confessions is one of their best songs. Ok nvm all their songs are their best (Y)
Monday, September 12, 2011
Back to school.
Term starts again. Time passes so fast. I can still recall so clearly how I was contemplating whether or not to go NY or AJ. And then suddenly I turned the JAE book to the next page after NY, and there before me was National JC. I never heard of that school in my entire life until then. Yeah yeah I know, I'm naive and narrow minded -.- but I guess it's because it's mostly good students from good schools go there and I was aiming realistically at NY from the start of last year. I wonder what made me change my choice. Maybe my parents. Maybe because i had a good feeling (LOL) about going NJ. It's just one of those moments. Even though going in alone at first with nobody else from my class was a bit daunting, I still managed to make new friends and survive in the hectic jc lifestyle. And honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way.
So first day of school. Didn't really feel like first day of school. Just felt like returning back to the same old place as if I went there everyday of my life.
Had to do maktab today cause samuel was MIA. Didn't see him in Chinese too. Wonder what happened to him :O anyway I managed to avoid SP at the atrium during my duty. I made sure I avoided any eye contact with her and I ran away from the atrium after I was done.
Was doing Gp essay outline and phy consol rev package the whole day during other lessons. Sian. But glad that I managed to finish in the end. Realized how screwed my projectile motion is.
During PE we played captain's ball. I also realized that I can't jump high.
It was really fun but tiring. Oh I also realized my endurance sucks too.
Oh and today I showed Nicholas the strangling method thing. Tried to strangle him during PE and he did some nerve screwing elbow nudge on my stomach chest area. Must thank him for teaching me a new move and pointing out a flaw in my strangling method.
After school, Han Ru helped me hand up my phy consol rev package (thanks a lot!) cause I had to go write the apology letter for SP. Wrote an utter shit load of nonsense that was just purely hypocrisy at it's best.
Then bade goodbye to Joel and Zi Wei and went to study with Rosemund, Zhi Yong and Nicholas at the grandstand. It was unproductive cause we ended up discussing the econs essay yet we didn't do anything much.
Then went home. Fell asleep on the bus. Luckily I woke up in time to alight. Ate bathe and now I'm doing work. Well that's all for now.
Trying to make it work,
But man,
These times are hard...
So first day of school. Didn't really feel like first day of school. Just felt like returning back to the same old place as if I went there everyday of my life.
Had to do maktab today cause samuel was MIA. Didn't see him in Chinese too. Wonder what happened to him :O anyway I managed to avoid SP at the atrium during my duty. I made sure I avoided any eye contact with her and I ran away from the atrium after I was done.
Was doing Gp essay outline and phy consol rev package the whole day during other lessons. Sian. But glad that I managed to finish in the end. Realized how screwed my projectile motion is.
During PE we played captain's ball. I also realized that I can't jump high.
It was really fun but tiring. Oh I also realized my endurance sucks too.
Oh and today I showed Nicholas the strangling method thing. Tried to strangle him during PE and he did some nerve screwing elbow nudge on my stomach chest area. Must thank him for teaching me a new move and pointing out a flaw in my strangling method.
After school, Han Ru helped me hand up my phy consol rev package (thanks a lot!) cause I had to go write the apology letter for SP. Wrote an utter shit load of nonsense that was just purely hypocrisy at it's best.
Then bade goodbye to Joel and Zi Wei and went to study with Rosemund, Zhi Yong and Nicholas at the grandstand. It was unproductive cause we ended up discussing the econs essay yet we didn't do anything much.
Then went home. Fell asleep on the bus. Luckily I woke up in time to alight. Ate bathe and now I'm doing work. Well that's all for now.
Trying to make it work,
But man,
These times are hard...
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Do not smoke
Holy shit i found this in my drafts in my blog a year ago, it's a story of a boy who hates smokers:
Insane. That's what they said I was. That's the label they put on me. Here I was, stuck in an asylum for my 'wrongdoing'. I found nothing wrong in what I did. I am not crazy. I just did what everyone secretly wanted to do. Or was it just me? Questions ringed in my head, pondering at my own sanity. Was everyone crazy? Or was I mad? Questions. I remembered vividly the question that changed my life, and ended others...
I gazed silently at the coffin, as it slowly entered the flaming depths of nothingness. It was ironic. My grandfather used to smoke at least two packs of cigarettes a day, weezing away as he took slow puffs off that irksome stick. Now, his lifeless body lay in the coffin, burning into ashes, just as how he too, lit that sickening cigarette as its embers and ashes littered the floor. Everyone around me was crying grievely. Only I stood there emotionlessly. I never liked or hated him. I was extremely neutral towards him since we hardly interacted. But I couldn't stand him whenever he took a puff, it disgusted me totally, and it drove me mad. He would release the choking smoke at my face as I walked passed, and inhaling it made me sick.
"Are you alright there?" asked my mother, who tapped my shoulders in concern, as she wiped back tears of sorrow.
"I'm fine." i answered nonchalently.
"I know you must be really sad about your grandfather's death, but people have to die one day..." she explained to me.
Fool. Like I cared that he was dead. I was so much happier without having to tolerate the smell of cigarettes.
"Don't worry I'm fine." I replied, slightly irritated.
"Well I hope this teaches you one thing. Don't ever smoke. It will kill you. You see what it did to grandpa. I don't want you to pick up this bad habit and get lung cancer and suffer. And don't ever mix around with smokers, alright?"
"Alright."
Lies.
My relatives said that I changed a lot since the funeral. They said it was because I couldn't handle the loss of my grandpa so much so that I often became violent and angry. They were wrong. Little did I know there was a demon inside me, one that tormented me to do evil deeds. In the end, I did mix around with smokers. But for even more wrong reasons. You might think I'm crazy to do this. But I did get close to smokers. I hanged around them, made friends with them, got to know them. All for the sake of my undertaken mission, to kill all of them. I don't know why I wanted to do so. Maybe it was because I hated smokers. Maybe it was because I'd rather kill them now than see them die slowly through smoking. Maybe I simply wanted them dead. It would benefit the entire world. So I murdered them all, burning them while they were asleep with the very lighter they used to light their cigarettes. It was not long before I was caught for my 'crime' and I was deemed an unstable juvenile that deserves to be isolated from society. Society. The very people whom I sought to protect had betrayed me. From that day on, I vowed to rid the world of all it's screwed up people. Once I get out of this prison, they will all taste my wrath...
Insane. That's what they said I was. That's the label they put on me. Here I was, stuck in an asylum for my 'wrongdoing'. I found nothing wrong in what I did. I am not crazy. I just did what everyone secretly wanted to do. Or was it just me? Questions ringed in my head, pondering at my own sanity. Was everyone crazy? Or was I mad? Questions. I remembered vividly the question that changed my life, and ended others...
I gazed silently at the coffin, as it slowly entered the flaming depths of nothingness. It was ironic. My grandfather used to smoke at least two packs of cigarettes a day, weezing away as he took slow puffs off that irksome stick. Now, his lifeless body lay in the coffin, burning into ashes, just as how he too, lit that sickening cigarette as its embers and ashes littered the floor. Everyone around me was crying grievely. Only I stood there emotionlessly. I never liked or hated him. I was extremely neutral towards him since we hardly interacted. But I couldn't stand him whenever he took a puff, it disgusted me totally, and it drove me mad. He would release the choking smoke at my face as I walked passed, and inhaling it made me sick.
"Are you alright there?" asked my mother, who tapped my shoulders in concern, as she wiped back tears of sorrow.
"I'm fine." i answered nonchalently.
"I know you must be really sad about your grandfather's death, but people have to die one day..." she explained to me.
Fool. Like I cared that he was dead. I was so much happier without having to tolerate the smell of cigarettes.
"Don't worry I'm fine." I replied, slightly irritated.
"Well I hope this teaches you one thing. Don't ever smoke. It will kill you. You see what it did to grandpa. I don't want you to pick up this bad habit and get lung cancer and suffer. And don't ever mix around with smokers, alright?"
"Alright."
Lies.
My relatives said that I changed a lot since the funeral. They said it was because I couldn't handle the loss of my grandpa so much so that I often became violent and angry. They were wrong. Little did I know there was a demon inside me, one that tormented me to do evil deeds. In the end, I did mix around with smokers. But for even more wrong reasons. You might think I'm crazy to do this. But I did get close to smokers. I hanged around them, made friends with them, got to know them. All for the sake of my undertaken mission, to kill all of them. I don't know why I wanted to do so. Maybe it was because I hated smokers. Maybe it was because I'd rather kill them now than see them die slowly through smoking. Maybe I simply wanted them dead. It would benefit the entire world. So I murdered them all, burning them while they were asleep with the very lighter they used to light their cigarettes. It was not long before I was caught for my 'crime' and I was deemed an unstable juvenile that deserves to be isolated from society. Society. The very people whom I sought to protect had betrayed me. From that day on, I vowed to rid the world of all it's screwed up people. Once I get out of this prison, they will all taste my wrath...
Another lazy day~
They finally came up with a blogger app! It's good cause now it's more convenient for me to blog without having to on the com anymore.
Anyway the past few days have been quite productive, managed to finish up lots of work. But there's still a lot more left. And I haven't started revising for promos yet lol. I think my GP is screwed. I have been neglecting it for so long.
I just realised I have to do 4 econs essay in a matter of 3 days for next week. Yay.
This morning when I woke up, I checked fb and I read Ken's post. It was really inspiring. I hope he does not retain and i hope that if he makes it through he won't slack off in j2 and would continue on with great determination.
So anyway I updated my blog. Changed the skin and made it a little simpler for reading. Off to do my work. What a lazy day~
Apparently when I laugh, my face looks like the :D emoticon.
Anyway the past few days have been quite productive, managed to finish up lots of work. But there's still a lot more left. And I haven't started revising for promos yet lol. I think my GP is screwed. I have been neglecting it for so long.
I just realised I have to do 4 econs essay in a matter of 3 days for next week. Yay.
This morning when I woke up, I checked fb and I read Ken's post. It was really inspiring. I hope he does not retain and i hope that if he makes it through he won't slack off in j2 and would continue on with great determination.
So anyway I updated my blog. Changed the skin and made it a little simpler for reading. Off to do my work. What a lazy day~
Apparently when I laugh, my face looks like the :D emoticon.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Project Work
Project Work. Those two words strike a wave of negative emotions into every JC1 student. Most despise the subject, finding it a chore and a waste of time. I used to think so too, and since the start of PW i've always tried to sought out why would MOE want to implement something like that. Today, i finally thought of a reason that would suffice.
The most important thing that PW has taught me is not how to write reports, how to be more creative, how to analyze better etc. , but it has taught me that in the future when we go out to work in society, we do not get to choose who our colleagues are. That, i find, is the only good thing about PW - it forces you to work with a group of people whose character and skills you're not so familiar with at the start of the year. Yeah you may find me a mad student to say that, PW is useful in one and only one thing: it exposes me to the working world. In truth, we do not get to choose our colleagues. We can choose our friends, we can choose our spouses, but we can never choose our colleagues, similarly, we cannot choose out PW group members.
Luckily for me, I can work well with everyone in my PW group. That taught me one thing. Luck. If you're lucky enough to have colleagues in the future that you can work well with, then your working life would be enjoyable and smooth. BUT, if you have a PW group that has/have domineering/lazy/pessimistic etc. then working with them would be extremely difficult and your life would suck. That's something I learned through seeing other group(s) in my class, thankfully not from my own. Wouldn't want to mention which group(s), but i'm sure my class knows. I've learned from that group(s) that there really are some screwed up people in this world who are take things too seriously and are too demanding and domineering. Pessimistic and also stubborn to ideas; that's not what a leader is supposed to be... However, just like any learning milestone, we learn from other people's good and bad points...
so yeah that concludes everything i have to say about PW.
The most important thing that PW has taught me is not how to write reports, how to be more creative, how to analyze better etc. , but it has taught me that in the future when we go out to work in society, we do not get to choose who our colleagues are. That, i find, is the only good thing about PW - it forces you to work with a group of people whose character and skills you're not so familiar with at the start of the year. Yeah you may find me a mad student to say that, PW is useful in one and only one thing: it exposes me to the working world. In truth, we do not get to choose our colleagues. We can choose our friends, we can choose our spouses, but we can never choose our colleagues, similarly, we cannot choose out PW group members.
Luckily for me, I can work well with everyone in my PW group. That taught me one thing. Luck. If you're lucky enough to have colleagues in the future that you can work well with, then your working life would be enjoyable and smooth. BUT, if you have a PW group that has/have domineering/lazy/pessimistic etc. then working with them would be extremely difficult and your life would suck. That's something I learned through seeing other group(s) in my class, thankfully not from my own. Wouldn't want to mention which group(s), but i'm sure my class knows. I've learned from that group(s) that there really are some screwed up people in this world who are take things too seriously and are too demanding and domineering. Pessimistic and also stubborn to ideas; that's not what a leader is supposed to be... However, just like any learning milestone, we learn from other people's good and bad points...
so yeah that concludes everything i have to say about PW.
nightmare
damn, just woke up from a nightmare. it was quite scary.. i was scared of myself at the end.
i was walking with my sec 2 class along the road from zhss to lorong chuan. we were walking happily and we were chatting a lot. as we were about to walk pass the nearby condo, suddenly one of my classmates (let's call this classmate X, because if names are mentioned then it'll be quite offensive). so X took my water bottle from my bag and taunted me. i asked X to return it to me but X ignored me and gave a smug smile. i asked again, this time in anger. X turned away from me and the whole class started laughing at me. i was furious and tried to snatch my water bottle from X but X was too fast for me. X then threw my water bottle on the road and a fast car zoomed past and my water bottle exploded. i roared at X, as in literally roared like a demon. i lunged at X and managed to grab X by the neck. I strangled X kelvin-liew-style and X tried to struggle but it was too late. usually in reality if i do the kelvin-liew-style strangle i wouldnt use all my force, but in my nightmare i really meant to kill and use all my force on that strangle, and i could feel my forearm tensing up and my other arm pushing X's head downwards towards X's doom. My other classmates were staring at me and they stopped jeering, instead they looked shocked and scared. In a matter of a few minutes, X stopped struggling and X's eyes rolled up. I let go of X's corpse and it collapsed on the floor. Immediately, the whole class became some freaking zombie cannibal legion and started feasting on X's body, tearing X's limbs apart and devouring it with mouths full of blood. I laughed a maniac's laughter. after the class was done with X's body, i carried it and threw it on the road just as a huge truck was coming by. it ran over X's body and i laughed like a maniac again. suddenly i became aware of my dream and i tried to escape from it because it was getting insane and so i woke up to go toilet because i needed to pee lol.
i was walking with my sec 2 class along the road from zhss to lorong chuan. we were walking happily and we were chatting a lot. as we were about to walk pass the nearby condo, suddenly one of my classmates (let's call this classmate X, because if names are mentioned then it'll be quite offensive). so X took my water bottle from my bag and taunted me. i asked X to return it to me but X ignored me and gave a smug smile. i asked again, this time in anger. X turned away from me and the whole class started laughing at me. i was furious and tried to snatch my water bottle from X but X was too fast for me. X then threw my water bottle on the road and a fast car zoomed past and my water bottle exploded. i roared at X, as in literally roared like a demon. i lunged at X and managed to grab X by the neck. I strangled X kelvin-liew-style and X tried to struggle but it was too late. usually in reality if i do the kelvin-liew-style strangle i wouldnt use all my force, but in my nightmare i really meant to kill and use all my force on that strangle, and i could feel my forearm tensing up and my other arm pushing X's head downwards towards X's doom. My other classmates were staring at me and they stopped jeering, instead they looked shocked and scared. In a matter of a few minutes, X stopped struggling and X's eyes rolled up. I let go of X's corpse and it collapsed on the floor. Immediately, the whole class became some freaking zombie cannibal legion and started feasting on X's body, tearing X's limbs apart and devouring it with mouths full of blood. I laughed a maniac's laughter. after the class was done with X's body, i carried it and threw it on the road just as a huge truck was coming by. it ran over X's body and i laughed like a maniac again. suddenly i became aware of my dream and i tried to escape from it because it was getting insane and so i woke up to go toilet because i needed to pee lol.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
pleasant day
if i can choose one word to describe my day today, it would be pleasant.
woke up quite early today and reached school around 6.45am. went to sit at the podium stand and just gazed admiringly at the orange streaks in the sky. suddenly, a taxi drove in from the main gate. ahh the main gate. brings back 4-day old memories.
anyway, a malay young man alighted from the taxi, and he was carrying one huge luggage, two big luggage and one small backpack. he tried to carry all of his stuff towards the atrium but he struggled with it as there were too many to handle. i went down to offer him some help and he thanked me gratefully. he asked me if there was any place for him to sit down and set up his laptop, and i pointed out the atrium stairs. he thanked me again and he asked me why i was in school so early. i explained that i had a mock interview and econs lesson after that. somehow i was able to talk to him comfortably despite us being strangers. i asked him what he was there for and he said he was there to conduct a leadership program which involved playing with nerf guns. turns out he's a national paintball player and has taken part in many competitions and he likes to play with nerf guns. did i mention that he plays with nerf guns? yeah he plays with nerf guns. nerf guns. you know? the one im CRAZY ABOUT
we started talking about all the different nerf guns. he bought 100 mavericks for the leadership course lol. honestly idk how playing with nerf guns = leadership but hell yeah that's damn fun esp in a dull place like nj. they were gonna play dart tag, and he was going to set up obstacles like a paintball scenario. then he was complaining how he wanted to buy a warehouse in paya lebar to set up his first paintball field, but the landlord didnt want to sell it to him, instead he sold it to a climbing gym called KINETICS. holy. i instantly talked to him about climbing and all the experiences i had and he said he had a lot of friends in climbing too in NYP (he was from that poly) and he tried it before also and said it was really fun but he prefers paintball lol. then somehow we drifted to the topic of NS, and he told me that he was a fireman sergeant and how he sees people committing suicide and how he saves people from fire and how its so fun to slide down the pole from the 2nd to the 1st level. and all the different equipment he uses to extinguish the fire and to catch people that want to jump off buildings to commit suicide.
it amazes me how strangers of different age groups can actually be friends. we talked for an hour, and then unknowingly it was 7.45am. time passes really fast when you're talking to someone. i said goodbye to him and went to find miss lim for the mock interview. anyway she said i was ok just that i shouldnt point out my flaws during the interview. hmm. guess being a hypocrite is all part of an interview...
so went for econs lesson after that. leon showed me something which really pissed me off. other than that econs lesson went smoothly. listened to him talk crap for 2 hours LOL
after econs, went to eat lunch at pizza hut with mr lee and most of my class. the food was nice and i kept trying to burp but it was really hard and i hate the feeling of not being able to burp cause it's the same feeling of pre-vomitting. zhi yong tried to top up his ez link card with the dbs atm machine but it didnt seem to work so he had to pay coins to get home lol. too bad bukit timah has no mrt. after that we split ways and zhi yong ran for the bus and i took bus with yun ying and jin yong while jia xian waved goodbye to us and then i stopped at nj bus stop and said bye to yun ying and said bye to jin yong at the school gate and then 156 came and then i boarded 156 and then i came home slept a while went to bathe come out use the com and..... now im typing this post k bye need to go do superposition tmr got physics lesson
woke up quite early today and reached school around 6.45am. went to sit at the podium stand and just gazed admiringly at the orange streaks in the sky. suddenly, a taxi drove in from the main gate. ahh the main gate. brings back 4-day old memories.
anyway, a malay young man alighted from the taxi, and he was carrying one huge luggage, two big luggage and one small backpack. he tried to carry all of his stuff towards the atrium but he struggled with it as there were too many to handle. i went down to offer him some help and he thanked me gratefully. he asked me if there was any place for him to sit down and set up his laptop, and i pointed out the atrium stairs. he thanked me again and he asked me why i was in school so early. i explained that i had a mock interview and econs lesson after that. somehow i was able to talk to him comfortably despite us being strangers. i asked him what he was there for and he said he was there to conduct a leadership program which involved playing with nerf guns. turns out he's a national paintball player and has taken part in many competitions and he likes to play with nerf guns. did i mention that he plays with nerf guns? yeah he plays with nerf guns. nerf guns. you know? the one im CRAZY ABOUT
we started talking about all the different nerf guns. he bought 100 mavericks for the leadership course lol. honestly idk how playing with nerf guns = leadership but hell yeah that's damn fun esp in a dull place like nj. they were gonna play dart tag, and he was going to set up obstacles like a paintball scenario. then he was complaining how he wanted to buy a warehouse in paya lebar to set up his first paintball field, but the landlord didnt want to sell it to him, instead he sold it to a climbing gym called KINETICS. holy. i instantly talked to him about climbing and all the experiences i had and he said he had a lot of friends in climbing too in NYP (he was from that poly) and he tried it before also and said it was really fun but he prefers paintball lol. then somehow we drifted to the topic of NS, and he told me that he was a fireman sergeant and how he sees people committing suicide and how he saves people from fire and how its so fun to slide down the pole from the 2nd to the 1st level. and all the different equipment he uses to extinguish the fire and to catch people that want to jump off buildings to commit suicide.
it amazes me how strangers of different age groups can actually be friends. we talked for an hour, and then unknowingly it was 7.45am. time passes really fast when you're talking to someone. i said goodbye to him and went to find miss lim for the mock interview. anyway she said i was ok just that i shouldnt point out my flaws during the interview. hmm. guess being a hypocrite is all part of an interview...
so went for econs lesson after that. leon showed me something which really pissed me off. other than that econs lesson went smoothly. listened to him talk crap for 2 hours LOL
after econs, went to eat lunch at pizza hut with mr lee and most of my class. the food was nice and i kept trying to burp but it was really hard and i hate the feeling of not being able to burp cause it's the same feeling of pre-vomitting. zhi yong tried to top up his ez link card with the dbs atm machine but it didnt seem to work so he had to pay coins to get home lol. too bad bukit timah has no mrt. after that we split ways and zhi yong ran for the bus and i took bus with yun ying and jin yong while jia xian waved goodbye to us and then i stopped at nj bus stop and said bye to yun ying and said bye to jin yong at the school gate and then 156 came and then i boarded 156 and then i came home slept a while went to bathe come out use the com and..... now im typing this post k bye need to go do superposition tmr got physics lesson
Monday, September 5, 2011
Shit
going to start epic mugging week, mug all day mug all night until my brain gets fried.
today's SCA young climber's conference was postponed to some other day.. hopefully after promos so that zhi yong can go.
woke up with my headache gone.
erm nothing much to say about yesterday and today, practically wasted my time away. this only shows that the only life i have is in school...
still haunted by the stupid gate climbing incident. honestly, if they don't want us to climb the gate for our safety, then why put barb wires around the fence to stab us and cause us harm? it's so ironic sometimes. it's like a caged animal that is kept in a cage by zookeepers because the zookeepers are afraid of it being harmed by the outside world, when trapping it inside is harming it already.
maybe im too immature to see it from the school's point of view. i tried my best to find a reason why climbing a gate is not allowed. damaging school property? disgracing the school's reputation? idk. but definitely not for our safety, the way i see it. i dont see barb wires on ZHSS fences. i don't see myself getting screwed when a teacher knew i climbed over a gate in ZHSS. there was freedom there. where is the freedom now? jail of the nation...
well at least in this jail there are some cellmates that aren't so bad.
nvm. i'll just wait till the time i'm as ripe as the bananas beside the rock wall, and maybe till then i'll think of a good reason. for now, i'll just focus on promos and enjoying myself thru climbing like a mad man after it ends. i must treasure the time i have before research starts to climb like crazy. cant wait for overseas trip and the new shoes too, and probably the freaking climbing singlet that is taking so long to alter...
oh yeah and i left my earphones in my pants and it got washing machined. now it doesnt work anymore so i guess i'm going to buy a new one soon. my dad has some back problem and couldnt go to work today. i guess life sucks now because everyone is suffering or getting shit. maybe thats why i subconsciously named the title of this post shit. when life gives u shit, flush the toilet...
going to eat an early lunch now. bye.
today's SCA young climber's conference was postponed to some other day.. hopefully after promos so that zhi yong can go.
woke up with my headache gone.
erm nothing much to say about yesterday and today, practically wasted my time away. this only shows that the only life i have is in school...
still haunted by the stupid gate climbing incident. honestly, if they don't want us to climb the gate for our safety, then why put barb wires around the fence to stab us and cause us harm? it's so ironic sometimes. it's like a caged animal that is kept in a cage by zookeepers because the zookeepers are afraid of it being harmed by the outside world, when trapping it inside is harming it already.
maybe im too immature to see it from the school's point of view. i tried my best to find a reason why climbing a gate is not allowed. damaging school property? disgracing the school's reputation? idk. but definitely not for our safety, the way i see it. i dont see barb wires on ZHSS fences. i don't see myself getting screwed when a teacher knew i climbed over a gate in ZHSS. there was freedom there. where is the freedom now? jail of the nation...
well at least in this jail there are some cellmates that aren't so bad.
nvm. i'll just wait till the time i'm as ripe as the bananas beside the rock wall, and maybe till then i'll think of a good reason. for now, i'll just focus on promos and enjoying myself thru climbing like a mad man after it ends. i must treasure the time i have before research starts to climb like crazy. cant wait for overseas trip and the new shoes too, and probably the freaking climbing singlet that is taking so long to alter...
oh yeah and i left my earphones in my pants and it got washing machined. now it doesnt work anymore so i guess i'm going to buy a new one soon. my dad has some back problem and couldnt go to work today. i guess life sucks now because everyone is suffering or getting shit. maybe thats why i subconsciously named the title of this post shit. when life gives u shit, flush the toilet...
going to eat an early lunch now. bye.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
L1 Gate Climbing Course
i don't want to talk about today. too sian alr.
anw just to summarise everything.
had L1 course this morning until late afternoon.
left the school. climbed the gate with oac bros. got caught by the prison warden of nj. she got down our names and class and our cca.
honestly i dont give a f about what she's gonna throw at me, be it CWO, yellow slip, kick out of maktab duty, kick out of cca exco, poor conduct at the end of the year, lousy testimonial, etc. or even expulsion. i dont care. im only guilty of the fact that i disgraced OAC, and i let everyone down. esp miss gao. idk how im gonna face her but i'm going to have to do it eventually.
dont want to talk about it anymore.
i guess i've finally found something i hate about nj...
anw just to summarise everything.
had L1 course this morning until late afternoon.
left the school. climbed the gate with oac bros. got caught by the prison warden of nj. she got down our names and class and our cca.
honestly i dont give a f about what she's gonna throw at me, be it CWO, yellow slip, kick out of maktab duty, kick out of cca exco, poor conduct at the end of the year, lousy testimonial, etc. or even expulsion. i dont care. im only guilty of the fact that i disgraced OAC, and i let everyone down. esp miss gao. idk how im gonna face her but i'm going to have to do it eventually.
dont want to talk about it anymore.
i guess i've finally found something i hate about nj...
it's hard to speak without a tongue
another long day.
woke up quite late today, around 11am. or should i say woke up quite late yesterday, since now its alr midnight.
went to eat my brunch and went to bathe. did my work half-heartedly until 5 plus. lazed around and set off to bishan to meet liang min at 6. we walked about and talked for a while. found out some stuff that i didn't know and made me feel like im a really selfish and insensitive bastard. i'm sorry for what i said previously, i didn't know what i wrote would be offensive. sometimes it really is hard to judge from another person's point of view. "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." Ever since i offended others last time, i always think twice before i post anything. but i guess empathy is a quality i lack severely. if you all are reading this, if you know i'm talking about you, please know my friend, i love to stay where you are, please smile, smile when you think about me, my body's gone, that's all.
enough said, not gonna elaborate any further.
me and liang min met with tai lim, then went to eat at S11 hawker centre. sys and jien hsiu came soon after. then we headed for bishan active after everyone finished eating. fooled around at the playground and vetted the scouts' routes at around 9pm. seeing them on their hike brings back lots of good memories. many of them had to make changes so we waited for them to tidy up their routes before vetting again. built a basha while waiting. talked to liang min about many stuff that has happened throughout the past 7 months. after vetting once more, liang min sys and me left for bishan j8 to go home. my mum gave me a lift home. came home, bathe, on the com and typed out this post.
tired.
going to sleep. goodnight.
oh and about the title, it's one of my favourite song:
and its about shutting the fuck up and not hurting others, something i should really do.
woke up quite late today, around 11am. or should i say woke up quite late yesterday, since now its alr midnight.
went to eat my brunch and went to bathe. did my work half-heartedly until 5 plus. lazed around and set off to bishan to meet liang min at 6. we walked about and talked for a while. found out some stuff that i didn't know and made me feel like im a really selfish and insensitive bastard. i'm sorry for what i said previously, i didn't know what i wrote would be offensive. sometimes it really is hard to judge from another person's point of view. "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." Ever since i offended others last time, i always think twice before i post anything. but i guess empathy is a quality i lack severely. if you all are reading this, if you know i'm talking about you, please know my friend, i love to stay where you are, please smile, smile when you think about me, my body's gone, that's all.
enough said, not gonna elaborate any further.
me and liang min met with tai lim, then went to eat at S11 hawker centre. sys and jien hsiu came soon after. then we headed for bishan active after everyone finished eating. fooled around at the playground and vetted the scouts' routes at around 9pm. seeing them on their hike brings back lots of good memories. many of them had to make changes so we waited for them to tidy up their routes before vetting again. built a basha while waiting. talked to liang min about many stuff that has happened throughout the past 7 months. after vetting once more, liang min sys and me left for bishan j8 to go home. my mum gave me a lift home. came home, bathe, on the com and typed out this post.
tired.
going to sleep. goodnight.
oh and about the title, it's one of my favourite song:
and its about shutting the fuck up and not hurting others, something i should really do.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Another good day at school!
Wow today was really eventful. I'll try and keep it as short as possible but i'll probably end up blurting everything out in 1 long paragraph that will turn people off from reading it and so i will try my best to break it up into neat paragraphs for you all to read.
woke up at 5.30am as usual. came to school in NJ pe attire. saw Samuel outside the store and sat down with him to talk for a while. Timo came to retrieve his bag from the store. (his bag was locked inside and he had to run back home the day before) Started signing and collecting the money from the climbers for Miss Gao's present. Here's a photo of it:
credits to Zheng Qian for the photo :)
After that many other OAC people came, and Eunice splitted the board that the OACians wrote for all three teachers into three parts for the three different teachers-in-charge. I was to give the board to Miss Gao. Went for assembly, found Miss Gao with the help of Zhi Yong, gave her the tile and the board and i think she was really happy and touched :)
After assembly, went with my class to go and change to our sec sch uniform. too bad our classroom was locked D: end up we went to the raintree cafe to camp and take photos. After that we left for LT5 for the teacher's day performance. i managed to guess correctly in some game in which we had to guess which teacher was singing, and of course that teacher that i guessed correctly was Miss Gao LOL. then we saboed a lot of people to go up to stage to participate. overall the performance was really great, sadly it ended on a bad note because of technical difficulties :(
We were dismissed, and our class went to the canteen and leon presented mr lee with the lightsaber present. i think mr lee really appreciated it :D gave mr lee the rose i ordered from leon and ran to the staff room to give another rose to Miss Gao and she was surprised that i gave her two presents. Oh and also, she informed me that i have to go for a Singapore Climbing Association (SCA) Conference on Monday at Onsight with Joel and we would learn how to set routes properly and we also get to climb :D sad that zhi yong couldn't go, could tell that he really wanted to go :( but i hope this would only motivate him to give his all for promos and do well so that he wont kana student at risk from now onwards and get banned from climbing. Jiayou DOGGY OZZY!
Took some more photos at the canteen, realised that PW got cancelled, hurried to rush off back to ZHSS, felt bad to ian for making him wait for me, but really appreciate his patience :) went with the marist guys to take 852 and then marymount and then i alighted at serangoon while the cat high guys alighted at bishan. come to think of it, it's so strange that we never met each other last time even though our schools were only one or two stops away. it amazes me sometimes how the person that walked passed you today could be someone you meet next time in the future, and may also be a great influence in your life.
Reached serangoon, ran with ian to the void deck behind ZHSS, and i changed out there (luckily nobody saw xD) then ran back to ZHSS. it was great to go back. but something feels empty inside of me. something is missing and i don't know what it was. anyway, met mummy after so long and talked to him for a while. realised he isnt doing well at all in AJ. but like what he said, if what he is going through is even worse than what society would treat us like next time, then he might as well count his blessings and be glad that he would be prepared for the future shit being thrown at him by society.
left for nicholas' house after that with suharyo. gate crashed his house when he just woke up lol. he showed us the project he made for his module in his poly course (3D animation and arts) it was damn cool. he made himself fly and do a lot of cool shit i only thought was possible in movies. he's going to be a successful animator one day for sure. he showed me some more lulz that we used to share in sec 4 like video 005 only this time it was dubbed for more lulz. and then we redubbed the classic video of "a day at work part 3". if you havent watched the original, go watch it! it's in my fb profile and its damn funny and nostalgic. cant wait to work at ST at the end of the year :) hopefully i have time though, if i get into research i may end up sleeping at 3am everyday.
after that we met sheng cong and jie ming at 2.30pm at sgoon central macs and we ate our lunch while talking and laughing. too bad there was only 5 of us. wish more of the e4 guys were there. but eventually our numbers will dwindle until nobody returns. but still, we can all look forward to jan 27 2021 when we get to meet the then 10 years older SOH YONG SHENG. then we went to kovan to play pool. it was fun cause we kept screwing up and making funny moves and getting tyco shots. ate dinner at the hawker centre at kovan and then went home to eat dinner again hehe. bathe, on the com, and started writing this post.
oh yeah, i almost forgot...
FINALLY FINISHED FIRST DRAFT OF WRITTEN REPORT WOOHOO GOOD JOB NJ081!!!
lol im tired. time to go sleep. today was a really wonderful day, and i won't ever forget this day.
the best class ever:
but maybe it's just fate; that commitments will always overrule my personal life...
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