Dedications

Lima Company Guardsmen, with the man I respect most in army. 

I really love this photo:) was pleasantly surprised when OC Lima came for our graduation ceremony. He has always been an inspirational fatherly figure to us guys in Lima. He inculcated in us good values, pushed us beyond our supposed limits during training, and instilled pride in us as WoSpecs. He has nurtured us to become good commanders and strong soldiers, something which I hope to achieve some day with the 6 men under my charge. Under his leadership, going through foundation term and infantry pro term both in Lima has really prepared me for the worst in GCC, and it has also changed me from a weak, scrawny piece of shit recruit to the guardsman I am today. 

And of course, my supportive family members who have always been there for me when I come back on weekends all tired out from the week's training. To the surprise gifts on my table from my sisters when I get home and to the long and sometimes depressing car rides back to camp on book in day from my parents. 

My army experience so far has been a long long one. There's just about 1 more year left before I ORD. In less than a year being in the army, I feel that I have really changed a lot. Society, life, friendship and leadership are just a few things I view differently now. The next remaining year left till the end will be completely different, as will finally be put in charge of men. No more guidance and reminders from others behind my back; no more trainee mode. My 6 men will rely and depend on me from the first day they step foot into camp, and I will impart all the knowledge I can to them if they give their due trust and respect for me. It's not going to be easy leading men; to motivate them when they have nothing to look forward to, to discipline them so that they won't  make severe mistakes etc. but it will definitely be a meaningful experience if I can make a difference in the lives of these 6 soldiers under me, and that they will fight for me when I'm at my lowest, just as how I would do the same for them. On the 12 dec when the men enlist for the very first time, I will work endlessly to make their army experience a worthwhile and meaningful one. It's a goal I hope to achieve next year on 12 dec when I ORD. 

Welcome to the Family

Week 4 has come to a close with the graduation ceremony of us newly trained guardsman warriors. And with that, I am finally part of the close knitted family, the Guards Formation. I have earned everything I could and learnt everything I should from the course. It was certainly no easy feat; it is probably the toughest experience I have been through so far, not just in army but my entire life. Today I graduated with pride on Victory Square, alongside many others who have fought and sought so hard for the coveted beret and tab. Not everyone can be a guardsman, and given this privilege I will definitely uphold it when I lead my men in time to come; to mould them into the guardsmen they want to see in themselves.

it is in the darkest hour that one seeks the brightest light, and so through GCC I realised what really motivates me to never give up throughout the course :) when the days are long and tiring, but you know there's always someone there to talk to at night. and I guess that's what kept me going all this while, and maybe now it's my turn to return the favour. now that GCC has ended, there's so much I want to do right now. But first, I have to recover from all the minor injuries from the Rite of Passage, which has really pushed me beyond my breaking point. My body feels so weak right now, I think it's best to get some rest, eat some proper food and gain back the weight I lost from the intense outfield. Don't really want to blog about ROP, because what happens then stays as it is and shall not be revealed. Looking forward to the days ahead, I know they are going to be worthwhile :)

Week 3

Hello everyone :) if there's anyone that actually still reads my blog. 

Week 3 was by far the slackest week because we had no turnouts/call backs at all, despite us having the paranoia/fear of it happening, which I think was sufficient mental torture for us. 

We did urban ops at the start of the week for 2 days and 1 night, it was rather easy for us infanteers cause the drills were similar to what we learnt in SCS :D

But the main highlight of this week was the 2km swim in the pool which I passed, which means that next week I get to complete the 2km coastal swim veto factor before heading for the Rite of Passage (ROP) which is gonna be hell... But after that's over, there's nothing stopping me from being a guardsman :)

We were supposed to do the heli live descent too, but it was cancelled due to bad weather :( which means we'll have to reschedule it to after GCC. So in the time being, I'm just gonna pass out as  GUADS :( haha it's just a joke, the letters don't mean anything like what some people thought ;D but I felt really sad that we just waited at the air base like a bunch of idiots. I was so determined and excited to rappel of the heli, it was the one thing that I looked forward to throughout GCC, bt the weather just had to be a bitch that day :(

Apart from that, had ippt yesterday (yeah we were confined on a Saturday again) even though I was down with a flu and I still didn't get the normal infantry gold even though yesterday was my last chance because from then on, I would have to get guards gold which is 5 points for everything and a <9:15 timing for 2.4 -.- but I'm still glad that my ippt has improved a lot, especially for my 2.4. I'm feeling fitter than I ever was in army, though I still miss that fitness I used to have when I was in climbing. Can't do as many pull ups as I did before any more :( running will always be my bane, I'm just not cut out to run that fast no matter how hard I train. I'll just be satisfied if some day I can hit under 9:45. I'm getting closer and closer to it, but as for 9:15, I think that's beyond me already.. 

So I spent my weekend trying to recover as soon as I can from this stupid flu that is really pissing me off. I need my body to be healthy and strong because this upcoming final week isn't going to give me any mercy at all. Heh. Final week. It's been a long and tiring journey in GCC, but there's just one week left. Can't wait for it to be all over and to finally settle down with life. 

Week 2

This week was 6 days long, but it didn't feel as bad as the Week 1. I think I'm getting used to the tempo of the course and the standard expected of us. I guess it's all part of the army experience; learning to adapt to any situation you are thrown into. No matter how discomforting/painful it may be to you, you have to find the motivation to carry on with a smile.

The week started off with the coastal assault which was pretty cool :D felt like some world war 2 D-Day soldier when we landed on the beach before searching and destroying the enemy LOL. then tuesday was quite relaxed, completed the 1.5km training swim in the pool. Was expecting a turnout that night but it didnt happen :O then wednesday we had the 8km fast march which i managed to pass :) and thus the turnout happened on wednesday night/thursday morning. we did the tyre race, log PT, stretcher carry, 2km fast march and a lot of takan push ups crunches jumping jacks flutter kicks buddha claps asdfghjkl with water being poured on top of us. then there was also a charlie mike where we had to carry on pulling tyres when we thought the turnout was alr over. but overall it wasn't as bad as the first turnout when we went to the beach to get tortured. earned the guards vocation badge after the turnout was over ^^ can't rmb what else we did that day hmm. then friday we did the heli mock up rappelling from the tower which was damn fun! the brief heartstopping moment right after you leap off the step on the 'heli' gave me a crazy adrenaline rush. but I really enjoyed it, high elements is definitely something I'm thrilled about :) then it was finally saturday, when we had our 10km fast march test in the morning, which is one of the factors that you have to pass in order to become a guardsman! proud to say that I managed to pass the fast march despite having diarrhoea right before it started LOL. I was feeling extremely shagged out, but right after the fast march they never give chance, and we were takaned again for all the mistakes we made throughout the course so far, such as flag stuns, descender drops etc. did like 300+ push ups, 200+ crunches, 200+ flutter kicks, unlimited amount of jumping jacks and buddha claps zzz. felt damn tired and weak during the whole exercise, but once it was over it felt like a pretty good workout LOL. 

anyway, life has been going well recently despite being in GCC :) weekends are really getting much better than last time, when i would just laze around at home doing nothing but feel miserable about having to book in again. just 2 more weeks left to endure :)

Week 1

I know I said I'd probably blog once GCC is over, but Week 1 of GCC felt like a month and there's just so much on my mind right now. Everyday was hectic and eventful that we always have too little admin time. It was definitely a culture shock for me, but I'm adapting and trying my best to survive. 

To summarize this week, I have completed my 4km and 6km fast march, my 500m and 1km swim, and practiced the tower rappelling and the coastal assault drill. Having to finish all my meals in a short amount of time is probably the one thing I hate most about GCC, but I have to get used to it I guess. The traditional turnout to ECP was actually not as bad as I expected, even though waking up in the middle of the night can be really frustrating. It was definitely a tough and challenging first week, and the following weeks to come would prove to be even worse than this. But I will strive on and never give up. I am already 1/4 done. Soon i'll be at the halfway mark, then edging towards the end on the third week, and then finally graduating with pride during the arduous 4th and final week. Surviving every week free from injuries is a blessing for me. 

When GCC is over I'm going to take a short break and get my life sorted out once and for all. Currently I'm 40% done with army and it feels fast yet kinda slow at the same time. Maybe it's because right now I'm not learning as much as I did before because I'm already accustomed to the army. It still sucks though, knowing that I'm not even halfway there yet. But I guess there's much to learn during the 1 year of leading the 6 men under my charge, to be responsible for everything they do. 

GCC is really not as easy as I thought it would be. However, I'm really thankful to have supportive family members and friends that cheer me on for the course when I lose the motivation to carry on, especially after a few unpleasant incidents that I encountered during the course..

Oh well :( Seeing the ugly side of people/society only serves to make you more mature. But I find it really sad that being more cautious/not trusting others is all part of maturity, because you're expected to get rid of your naiviety. 

Anw, I'm still thinking of what to do after GCC, during that short lull period I've got before my men enlist. Maybe I do have a rough idea on what I want to do, but I think I should plan all of it after I don the khaki beret instead, and not let any thoughts distract me from focusing on GCC. Maybe GCC won't be the most challenging thing I have ever done in my life after all. 

I'm beginning to realize that I don't even type 'haha's or 'lol's any more. Haha maybe it's true that I am a different person when it comes to blogging about my own personal thoughts lol. 

Idk how I'm gonna spend my upcoming weekends during GCC, but this weekend was definitely well spent for me :) booking in early in the evening later, feeling a little half hearted to rappel straight back into hell :( but only the strongest of metals can be forged in the hottest flames of hell.